Study Finds 1 in 10 British Couples Haven’t Had Sober Sex In Over Six Months

Posted: July 31, 2013 in Random Thought

One tenth of couples in the UK have stated that they’ve not had sober sex in over six months, according to a new survey. The poll, conducted by online pharmacy UKMedix.com, asked 1,811 adult ‘alcohol drinkers’, all in relationships, about their bedroom habits. They were asked, ‘When did you last make love to your partner without being under the influence of alcohol?’, with 11% answering more than half a year ago. When queried why this was the case, 66% said they’re never in the mood while sober. Just 52% said they last had sex with their partners without the influence of alcohol within the past month. 61% of overall respondents stated that alcohol made them more confident, while 40% believed being drunk made them poorer in bed. UKMedix.com’s Sarah Bailey said: “We Britons love our booze – in responsible measures, of course – but it seems that we may be letting the alcohol come between us and our partner in the bedroom. “It was shocking to see that as many as one in ten couples haven’t made love sober in over six months. Whilst there’s not necessarily anything wrong with this, our results show that many think booze affects the quality of our lovemaking in a negative way, and so it’s clearly impacting enjoyment between the sheets. “Too much booze can cause a wealth of serious health problems, many of which can directly impact our sex lives. “So cutting back and making good time for each other without the booze is vital – both for healthy relationships, and a healthy body!”

This hits near and dear to me. I’ve been single for a little over 3 years now. That’s a long fucking time. Now, about 85% of the times I’ve had sex since being single I’ve been hammered off my ass. This allows for two things to happen. 1) I can last forever and lay pipe like a goddamn sexual king. It’s really the best way to go when you first bang a girl. You can give her the time of her life. But that also brings about the other point. 2) I sometimes have whiskey dick and can’t bust a nut, which sometimes can be awkward. However, the girl usually doesn’t care because she’s drunk as well and as long as I’m taking her to pound town it’s all good in her mind.

With all of that being said, there’s still the 15% of the time where I’m having sober sex. During this time, I’ve had several (and by several I mean 8 times out of 10) instances where I just straight up can’t hold it. Can’t even come close to duplicating the pound town action I lay when I’m drunk. And this is a big problem because all of these times have been the third or fourth time banging the girl, but the first time sober. So she’s expecting China white and all I can give her is street level crack. This makes for some really awkward moments when it’s over because everything in sex is more awkward when you’re sober. I’ve been working on this but seriously think I have no shot until my next girlfriend where I can have steady sober sex again.

But in regards to the study, I think you just have a super low sex drive if you’re not hittin’ the bone zone at least twice a week with your girlfriend/boyfriend. Like, that’s literally the number 1 advantage of being in a relationship vs. being single. You get to fuck whenever you want. Get in all your practice while you can, men. Because take it from me, when you’re single and banging girls who aren’t your girlfriend sober…shit’s more stressful than fun.

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